Prayers for Others

Yes, my situation is bad, medically speaking. But I encourage you to pray for the following people who are also undergoing difficult cancer battles.

http://graceandrew.blogspot.com/2008/10/sooner-than-later-updated.html
I was just introduced to this blog a couple days ago and I still have a lot to read to learn Andrew's story. But basically, along with cancer elsewhere, he has lethal cancer in his spine. He also has a wife and 2 very young children. Now if you want to read about some amazing love for our Lord, then you need to read his entries. I also encourage you to watch the video at the bottom of this post.

http://www.fatcyclist.com/2008/10/20/jumbled-mess/ My brother sent me this blog when I was first diagnosed with breast cancer. It's actually a cycling blog...and I'm not much of a biker, except for around the block, but the writer Elden, is very funny. He also does a lot to encourage donations for cancer research. Elden's wife Susan was diagnosed with breast cancer a couple years ago and it progressed from there, into the bones, into the brain. They have four children. I believe two are tweens/teens and the twin girls are maybe around age 7. Susan had a really bad night last night.

http://cfhusband.blogspot.com/2008/10/latest.html I've been following this blog along with thousands and thousands of others for quite some time now. Tricia is a young woman living with Cystic Fibrosis who gave birth to preemie little Gwyneth last year. After a difficult delivery and later a double lung transplant, Tricia developed cancer often associated with transplant recipients. She just received news that the chemo she has been enduring has not worked.

I don't mean to make anyone sad or depressed with these posts. I've actually been following the blogs because they've been encouraging to me...reminding me to be a fighter. I hope if you take some time to pray for me and my family, that you can squeeze in some extra prayers for Tricia, Susan, Andrew and their families.

Lord, please cover these families with your love. Show them Your almighty healing power and let them know that it is through Your grace that they are saved and through You they will find peace. You are forever with them. May they call out to you for Your guidance with any decisions that they need to make with regard to their health and their families. Give them strength and hope and happiness. In Jesus name...Amen.

Matthew 17: 19-20
"I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, `Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."

You're back....but so am I!

One year ago today I had a mastectomy of my left breast. One year ago today started all the treatments...the surgery, then chemo, then radiation...of this cancer that was just supposed to be done with. My approach to my cancer was to get rid of it, do everything I could so that it didn't come back, and then work on making myself look normal again. I was going to deal with it, and then move on with my life as if I was never affected by cancer.

HA! to me!!!!!

You know some people get cancer and it is life changing for them. For me, it really wasn't. I just wanted to move on and forget about it. It's sad to say, but I didn't feel like I had learned any life lessons or learned to appreciate anything more than I did before cancer. I didn't feel any stronger; I didn't feel like I had some new lease on life. Although my faith and my relationship with God certainly did strengthen greatly, and I met a lot of wonderful and helpful people, but other than that, life was the same for me. And that's how I wanted it.

HA! to me!!!!!!!!

But I do believe that God was completely preparing me for what has come. I'm not going to get into a discussion of whether this was God's plan or the result of us living in a fallen world or the work of the Devil or just some fluke or what not. None of that really matters. My pastor did a great sermon a few weeks ago about whatever the cause of the suffering...it doesn't matter because God shows up in the midst of it. That He will be there no matter what you can count on. (You can actually listen to the sermon or watch the video here . Scroll down to 7/6/2008 to the sermon entitled Held by Greg Boyd. I highly encourage you to listen to it).

There were little things that helped prepare me for the return of the dreaded cancer. I had written on my July 25th post about my sudden newfound concern for cancer returning after reading a couple articles about it reoccurring in other people. And some of my friends can tell you that I was expressing this fear to them as well. So it was then, after about a month of really worrying about it, before I had any symptoms of my tumor, it was then that I made peace with myself about the cancer coming back. I still had that nagging feeling in the back of my mind, but I just prayed about it and just decided to be at peace with it.

I even wrote on Aug. 9th in the comments of a blogger Ann who had written about my situation on her blog here . I responded "Thank you for your very kind words. With my faith in the Lord, I really do feel like I have Someone else to help me through all this...literally pulling and pushing me along. Knowing that with Him, I really could face whatever was thrown at me. On a different note, I do believe that facing cancer is easier than the daily struggles we often face as moms...and the struggles are different for each mom. What an important job we have as mothers, and the ramifications of every decision we make, all affecting our childrens' futures, is sometimes very overwhelming to me! But aren't kids amazing...and so worth it!" My response to her was different than I probably would have responded even 2 weeks prior. One, I usually don't testify about God to people. It actually took a lot of effort for me to say to people that I was praying for them. I don't know why. If God was supposed to be Lord of my life, I certainly shouldn't be so shy to express that. Now I'm not an evangelist...I'm pretty sure that's not my calling. But I do feel that God was beginning to really work within me to really feel comfortable with my faith and expressing it better so that I could truly cope with what was to come.

Secondly, I noted in that comment above about kids being amazing and just worth it. Really, that is NOT something I would have said before. I mean, of course they're worth it, but I didn't always feel that way. I felt more frustrated by the "dailyness" of motherhood than actually enjoying it. Everything seemed like one big chore, and I wasn't enjoying any of it. But as I said, the Lord was preparing me. Because when I had that notion in my mind that the cancer could come back, something changed inside me. I suddenly started just enjoying my kids more. I stopped caring so much about trying to get the kitchen cleaned up right away after dinner and I started going outside with them and just hanging out. I started rocking Ella longer at night and just holding her and really feeling her joy. Even doing things like getting my kids breakfast when I really wanted to just be back in bed was actually enjoyable to me. I even came to the decision that I was not even going to look for another job to help satisfy that "I'm a teacher...I gotta teach and touch the minds of the future" craving that I have always had. For the first time ever, I must say that I was very content with not working and being able to stay home with my little ones. And as I said, this was BEFORE I knew about my brain tumor.

So God had certainly prepared me for when my tumor was found. Now I'm not saying that I was all happy and such. Of course I cried, and I was mad, and sad and frustrated and confused and defeated and a whole bunch of emotions all combined. But overall, now I can sincerely say that I'm at peace. I'm at peace knowing that all will be well. I'm at peace knowing that I have amazing people working on me and fighting with me and praying for me. I'm at peace with the fact that God will be there and hold me and my children and my husband. And at the end of it all, we will be winners.

And now one year after my original surgery, I must say HA to cancer. Because yeah, you're back. But so am I...and thanks to the Lord, I'm better than ever!

It will touch your heart.

Want to read a story of true hope and inspiration?

Then start here:http://cfhusband.blogspot.com/

It's the story of a young woman with Cistic Fibrosis, awaiting a double-lung transplant, when she discovered she was pregnant. The blog is her husband's, who is detailing their story that is occuring right now at the medical center at Duke. His wife is in an induced coma, after having a c-section of their little girl, at only 25 weeks. The husband's outlook, love, support and faith is nothing but inspiring.

I hope you get a chance to read a little of their story and to pray for their health, strength, and recovery.