So this weekend I finally wore one of my wigs. Couldn’t really show up at my Mother-in-law’s wedding with a scarf on my head. So I donned the fake do.
I hated it.
The entire time I was so self-conscious, and was in tears before I even left the hotel room. I think partly it was anxiety because I was going to see a lot of people from my husband’s family whom I hadn’t seen since all this started and I knew everyone was going to be asking how I was feeling. Also because the wig just looked horrible. I felt so uncomfortable in my own skin I just wanted to crawl under one of the tables and hang out there until the affair was over.
As the night went on, and I found myself distracted with my kids and other relatives, I felt better. Even though it still felt to me like I had to some Halloween costume on, I was able to at least smile a little bit. Even when people took pictures.
(Here I am with Cameron, Max and one of my nieces, Ajah)
So I wrote the above blog this morning, and then later on I went to the grocery store. While there, an older lady working one of the “sample stations”, who was obviously wearing a wig, saw me in my scarf-head and stopped me to tell me that she had cancer and to give me some words of encouragement. I thought maybe she was going through chemo now, but she told me she had it awhile ago, when the drugs were different. And that poor lady never got her hair back. But she said she was just thankful to God that she’s even alive.
What a beautiful attitude she had. One I should try to adopt.