UnDomestic

Writings of a teachermom, choosing to stay home with her kids, while loathing all domestic responsibilities! In late Aug. 2008, I was diagnosed with Triple Negative breast cancer. After surgery, chemo and radiation, I was given theall clear. However, in the late summer of 2008, I was diagnosed with a brain tumor, which metasticized to other areas.

Sunday, April 29, 2007

You're awesome...thanks mom!!!!!


My friend Andrea, who has had the strength of an oak while her husband has been away in Iraq for over a year (he was supposed to be home by now, but Bush had other plans), asked me how she can teach her kids to be more appreciative.

Me…she asked me….

The one whose son says, while we’re hanging out at MGM Studios in Florida, “I don’t want to go to this park. I want to go to a different park.”

Me…she asked me…

The one whose son cries because his father will not play Lego Star Wars with him, although he spent almost the entire weekend with him, going bike riding, fishing, having dinner, going for a walk, hanging out at a park, etc.

Me…she asked me…

The one whose son said to her after she brought us dinner from Boston Market, “Thanks for dinner, but next time, can you bring Tinucci’s?” (a local restaurant where we often get takeout chicken).

Me…she asked me…..WRONG PERSON to ask!!!!!!

Anyone have any ideas?

How do you teach your kids to appreciate what they have and what we do for them?
(Young kids that is….teenagers are just a lost cause.)

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7 Comments:

At 1:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

We are so fortunate to live in the land of plenty. But unless we are removed from our blessed circumstances,or are consciously in an awareness state we often don't realize what we have. At the end of the day either at dinner prayer or evening conversation or anytime really(for child and adult) it is a wonderful spiritual exercise to review our day together and express our appreciation for the littlest of things to major happenings, for a kindness we saw in someone, or a misfortune that allowed us to reach out to someone. We have many things and people to be greatful for and share our appreciation for their presence in our lives. Mom S

 
At 9:17 AM, Anonymous dana said...

First of all....is that tree sap all over Ella?

Teenagers are not always a lost cause....just the other day Chelsea thanked me for getting her the ingrediants to make smores.

That day when Cam wanted more from Melvin...he had all this attention from him, so naturally, he wanted more.

 
At 9:59 AM, Blogger Undomestic said...

No Dana, that's not tree sap. The boys attacked her with a water gun. She was NOT happy about that!

 
At 3:48 PM, Anonymous Kate said...

As a young child, my son never failed to say 'please' and 'thank you' and 'your welcome' etc. He is still pretty good about it, but sometimes needs a reminder.

By modeling, talking about and reinforcing the behavior we have given him the tools to understand the many, many blessings in his life and be appreciative of what he has. At some point we have to concede that the rest is up to him. He is 13, after all, and definitely not a lost cause. Only if we give up on him will that myth become a truth. Parenting may not seem like it is making a difference sometimes when kids are a certain age, but they listen and store it away.

 
At 4:17 PM, Blogger IrishMommy said...

I often wonder the same thing. Sometimes I say "thank you, so much mommy" out loud to myself when I feel unappreciated about ALL the things I do for my two little monkeys. They both say "Bless you" when someone sneezes. So, keep on modeling the please and thank you's!

 
At 5:41 PM, Blogger Undomestic said...

Okay, so I didn't really mean that teenagers are a lost cause. But they are very self-absorbed by nature.

But I guess it's not the Manners that I'm concerned about. My kids are actually pretty good about saying please and thank you...or so people tell me. It's the appreciating part that I'm trying to figure out. Like truly feeling thankful for the things that they have and not feeling like they should be entitled to everything.

 
At 10:48 PM, Blogger Kimberly said...

At times we **choose** to go without for a while in order to find that appreciation again. It's the times we say no to computer/TV/video games for a week or a season (we're nearing a no-TV season in our family--this summer!). It's when we purchase only one toy, one book, and one piece of clothing for one another at Christmas. It's when we choose to wait until a new movie is at the dollar-theater (usually several months after its release!) before we see it.

Then there are the times we deliver meals or gifts with Catholic Charities and actually get to meet face-to-face those who do without for one reason or another. Or when we ring bells for the Salvation Army during the Christmas season and PURPOSEFULLY have conversations in our family about W-H-Y organizations like those exist.

Even something as simple as donating things to the Goodwill can be turned into a lesson on appreciation if we're willing to take it a step further...and instead of simply dropping our bags off at the drive thru, we instead search out the battered-women's shelter in town and arrange to personally deliver the things we have to share.

There is no easy answer to this question and certainly what proves to cultivate a heart of appreciation in one child, may not in another. But maybe it all boils down to our kids seeing it in us somehow. Maybe it's our attitude towards and our comments about money, possessions, and the world that serve as the spring board for their views to take shape. Or maybe it takes an understanding of sacrifice, such as the one our Lord Jesus made for all the world, before one can understand how to be thankful for and good stewards of a blessing.

And on that note, YIKES!! What a big job we have as parents?!?!

 

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