Writings of a teachermom, choosing to stay home with her kids, while loathing all domestic responsibilities! In late Aug. 2008, I was diagnosed with Triple Negative breast cancer. After surgery, chemo and radiation, I was given theall clear. However, in the late summer of 2008, I was diagnosed with a brain tumor, which metasticized to other areas.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Maybe you can understand this better than I can

So here's the latest. I'm not having any more tests. The more tests I get, the more messed up results I get. Okay, I'm not that stupid, but the thought crosses my mind.

First here's the good news. There is no cancer in my hip. There was never any reason to think this, except that this is a common place for some cancers like mine to spread, so doing the MRI on my hip was really a precautionary measure. Also there is nothing cancerous in the bone in my leg. Since I have some numbness in my knee and still pain from my groin down my leg, this was a concern, but the MRI showed nothing, and it's probably just a side effect of the lumbar puncture done last week.

Also, I found out after further explanation from my husband, that cancer that I thought was shown in my spine, was actually in my spinal fluid. This makes a difference. The spinal fluid is around my brain, or in my brain, or at the bottom of my brain...or something like that. That which they found on the MRI, was not necessarily IN the spine. Of course, as usual, I often get medical details wrong...so I could continue to be wrong. Anyhow, the spinal fluid would eventually go into the spine. We're hoping that this did not happen, but it is still very concerning. and is a possibility. At least we know that the spinal fluid with the cancer that was in the brain, is being killed by the radiation that I'm currently receiving.

The bad news is that they might not have actually gotten all the cancer out of my brain. This was always a possibility. The doctors have described it like peeling an orange, or an apple or something like that. Although you might cut away all the cancer, there might be a thin layer left over, which is why you do chemo and/or radiation, to kill anything that may be lingering. When I had an MRI after my surgery, there was a thin layer that "lit" up, which could have been cancer left over, or it could have been "surgical change," which I don't get what that is, but it's supposed to be nothing to worry about. Seems like mine is probably actually something to worry about. Although, it's good to know that they've been doing radiation, therefore treating what might still be lingering cancer the way they would anyhow. Now there is also some discussion around whether it's possible/necessary /safe to do chemo now, or when I'm all done with radiation. And then there are some different options for the type of chemo, one that my doctor today said is "nothing to write home about."

Fortunately, I have this awesome husband who continues to be my amazing, medical, super-smart advocate. He's been contacting all sorts of medical personnel around the nation. Many of you don't know my husband and what he's battled to be where he is as a physician today, but just know that he is one determined man. Today, to get information about a particular chemo, he not only read the studies on the chemo, he contacted the doctor who actually did the studies. I am one blessed woman to have him as my husband.

Now my head is spinning just rereading all this very dumbed down medical jargon of mine. Just keep up the praying, and keep the faith with me.

Psalm 30:2 O LORD my God, I cried unto thee, and thou hast healed me.
Jeremiah 17:14 Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for thou art my praise.
Jeremiah 30:17(a) For I will restore health unto thee, and I will heal thee of thy wounds, saith the LORD;

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At 9:47 AM, Blogger Kimberly said...

You got it, babe! Praying, believing, and hoping each day alongside you!!!

At 11:08 AM, Blogger wiferhood said...

As I was reading this, I was thinking about Max and what he went through a few years ago. He is really smart and determined. You indeed are very blessed to have him as a husband. I feel blessed that he is my cousin and I am so proud of all he has accomplished.

Also, continue to study God's Word and apply it to your situation everyday. I am so glad to see scripture references at the end of your posts. It reminds all of us that God is a good God and loves us. He watches over His word to perform it.

Isaiah 55: 8-12b
8 “ For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,” says the LORD.
9 “ For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts.
10 “ For as the rain comes down, and the snow from heaven,
And do not return there,
But water the earth,
And make it bring forth and bud,
That it may give seed to the sower
And bread to the eater,
11 So shall My word be that goes forth from My mouth;
It shall not return to Me void,
But it shall accomplish what I please,
And it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it.
12 “ For you shall go out with joy,
And be led out with peace;
We are cheering you on out here in the Valley of the Sun :~D

At 11:35 AM, Blogger LH said...

On it!

And hooray for Melvin!


At 12:01 PM, Blogger Jaye said...

You are truly blessed with a wonderful husband, family and friends! We are continually praying for you! And I second "wiferhood's" sentiments wholeheartedly!

Numbers 12:13
"And Moses cried unto the LORD, saying, Heal her now, O God, I beseech thee"

Love and hugs!

At 4:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lots of prayers being sent your way Cari
Hugs, Dana

At 10:29 AM, Blogger Caro said...

Thank goodness for that husband of yours. He's one of a kind. As are you.

At 10:38 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

I came across your blog and was inspired by your strength. I am praying for you and your family as you go through this hardship in your life.

At 9:28 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Pam is walking in the 3-day this weekend so no one else has to go through this in the future. Thanks for your honesty and openness. It really helps others who are in the midst of this same ordeal.

We will say a prayer for you.

God Bless.

At 7:10 PM, Blogger AnnD said...

see - you still spin a perspective that makes me somewhat smile.

Take care girl - I think of you often.

You will beat this, and help the rest of us get the lingo right!

At 7:15 PM, Blogger Melinda said...

Praying for your complete healing Carrie! Also, praying for pain free days spent with your incredible family. God bless you!
Melinda (Andrea's sister-in-law)


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